We headed into the clinic about 8:30 this morning. I wasn’t confident that Peter’s counts would be high enough today, but I guess I was hopeful. After a bit of waiting I got the call that his ANC had not increased at all since Monday. In all honesty I was upset about the news. At first I thought it was just me being selfish – we just “wasted” 3 days, I didn’t want to go home, unpack, do laundry, bring the girls back home and get settled, only to turn back around in a few days and leave them again. But after a few minutes I realized that those weren’t the biggest reasons I was upset… I was really just sad for our son, who is the one who has to go through this for 1 more week than he already is. Don’t get me wrong, Peter didn’t complain one bit. It was just another “blood draw” and a couple more trips in the car for him. I guess it’s just one of those days where the reality of the situation isn’t sitting well with me.
Peter had a Hearing Test this afternoon before we left the cities. They had done a baseline test prior to him starting chemo in August. Since hearing loss can be a side effect they were re-testing to see where he was at. The good news is the inner ear is functioning fine and he doesn’t have any loss at this point in the “Normal/Speech Hearing Range”. But they did find his High Frequency Hearing to be about 20 decibals worse than normal for his age. This is not noticeable to him or us now, but High Frequency loss is typically an immediate side effect, and it can move into Normal Frequency hearing loss.
One perhaps more significant (and positive!) test result was the Kidney Function results looked normal. We are definitely thankful for that.
We are back home and it does feel good to be here. We are hoping Peter can start Round 5 on Monday and we are quite certain that the re-testing and surgery will now be postponed until after the holidays.
You may be wondering if I’m trying to become as good a writer as my brother Matt, and I wouldn’t even try! He’s been down with the flu so I thought I’d let him get some much-needed rest.
A journal of Peter’s journey
Dear Ericka, Ty, Peter and “the girls”,
Uncle Ed and I spent the day at Fairview today for my oncology and kidney test results. We thought about you and yours going through all these trials. Our hearts are with you and also our prayers. Please take each day as it is given and we know that with your strength and belief; things will fall into place. As soon as possible…we will try again to connect with Mary and you all.
Please tell Matt to get well too.
Love to you all,
Uncle Ed and Aunt roz
Hey Peter,
I’m so glad to hear the event at Timbermist was a great hit. I knew it would be. Everywhere I turn around I either hear people talking about you or see something written about you. When I hear someone talking about you I say that I know you and that I had the awesome privlige of taking care of you and your sisters in the summer. You and your sisters were always fun to play with and to take care of. We are disappointed that we couldn’t make it to your benefit. We had another committment that we could not get out of but you were in our thoughts and we hoped that you and your family were having a great time. Keep fighting! Remember God is with you every step of the way. He is with your whole family.
Love you very much
Paula, Brian, Kyle, Celia, Bodin, and Tanner Man
Dear Erika,
You are such a loving and brave little Mom. I wish I had the right words to tell you. The ups and downs of cancer are like a roller coaster. Hopefully, tomorrow will be better. You are all being so brave, and you can’t do it every day, every minute. Sometimes you just have to let down. It must be so hard to watch your little boy go through all these tests. I still remember, and I was an “old lady” when it happened to me! However, I am constantly amazed by the strength and toughness of all of you, the Eigners and the Hansons. Pete is from strong stuff–he is holding his own, and continued prayers and “doing what you have to do”–it will pay off, Erika. Just know that we, your friends, neighbors, relatives–we are all cheering for you even when we cannot be in the same room. Hang in there.
Love,
Bette
Your family is beautiful, Erika!
Hi Erika,
It’s been a little bit since I’ve checked in on you guys here to see how you are all doing. You keep your chin up, and just keep plugging along. You’ve all come a long way so far. I know it’s hard, when you want so much to protect your kids and take the pain away. I’m glad to hear the fundraiser at Timbermist went well.
Thinking of you often,
Heather
The the most courageous mommy out there~
Uffdah. Sounds like you have been thrown a curve ball. I was up about 3 hours ago (6am) checking Peter’s Page and read your update…as much as I wanted to sit down and type, type, type – I couldn’t at the time cuz Parker was hungry and I needed to hop in the shower and get ready for the flurry of kids to arrive at 7…. so, I have been walking around for 3 hours now with a heaviness in my heart. I respect your honesty (about feeling selfish) and I think it’s perfectly OK for you to feel that way. I admit that at times, even I felt selfish. I remember thinking that I just wanted this to be over… I just wanted Peter to be better and I just wanted Kate and Ellie and the Peteman to BE BACK AT DAYCARE so things would be “normal” again. It’s been 3 months now since Peter’s diagnosis…. and I (sadly!) still feel “selfish” sometimes. We, as human beings, yearn for a sense of normalcy and perfection in our lives and when things don’t go as planned, we tend to get irritated, upset, angry and down right mad. We tend to think, “this isn’t fair!!!!” I think we forget that it isn’t us who make the plans for our lives. It’s God. A prime example of this in my own life is my 5 month old son, Parker. 13 months ago when we first found out I was pregnant…. we about died! I remember thinking, “this isn’t fair”, “I didn’t plan this” , “now what am I gonna do??” , “now we have to do this and that and buy this and sell that and re-do this….” Whenever we told someone that this pregnancy was “unplanned”, we were told, “Oh no it wasn’t !! It was plannned long before you even knew it… it was God’s plan and God doesn’t make mistakes.” Everything happens for a reason…. we may not see the reason immediately (as in Peter’s case), but someday it will fall upon you. To stop and think that I once considered Parker as “unplanned” saddens me because now we couldn’t imagine our family without him… he is the most wonderful gift we could have received. 🙂
This bump in the road is only minor. As much as it may seem like a terrible set back to you, it is simply part of the healing plan for Peter. God know’s what He’s doing. Peter has proved time and time again that he can handle about anything – let things happen as they need to and I guarantee, everything will fall into place right as God has planned. In the meantime, enjoy a few more days with your family at home…. snuggle close and be thankful for the 3 beautiful blessings you have. I know I am thankful for mine…..
WHAT CANCER CAN NOT DO:
Cancer is so limited.
It cannot cripple Love.
It cannot shatter Hope.
It cannot corrode Faith.
It cannot destroy Peace.
It cannot kill Friendship.
It cannnot suppress Memories.
It cannnot silence Courage.
It cannot invade the Soul.
It cannot steal eternal Life.
It cannot conquer the Spirit.
To Pete-
Rest well this week and weekend buddy! We are praying very, very hard that you will be up and running again on Monday. Your spirit, courage and bravery amazes me on a daily basis! I wish I could steal just a small morsel of it! I do have a part of you with me on a daily basis, though. Your wristband reminds me of all the imporant things in life and it keeps me brave when I feel weak. I got an infected tooth pulled out on Tuesday…. and I squeezed your wristband during the entire procedure. I could feel your spirit around me…. and I remained brave and comfortable the whole time…. honestly.
Much love and prayers to the entire Eigner family! We miss you all very much and are dreaming of the day when you CAN return to daycare!
Love~
Jenni, Ryan, Emily, Lily and Parker 🙂
Erika, Hang in there ( I believe you are entitled to get down once in a while). You and Ty have taught us so much about “Love of Family” and handling adversity. You are always in our thoughts and prayers!! Z and family
Hang in there Erika. The greatest of teams have bumps in the road. While they have control over the bumps; you, Ty and Peter do not. Bottom line you are a great team and will overcome this obstacle. Keep the faith. There is a lot of reasons to believe because you have a huge following; the prayers are there and the substance of those involved is certainly there. ole gringo
Erika,
Your message brought back many memories of when Caden was sick. I had numerous moments where I felt “inconvenienced” and “selfish”. When I reflected on those feelings like you did I knew it was because I just didn’t want the whole situation to be happening – I just wanted it to be over.
One of the hardest things with cancer is there is no “quick fix”. You can’t go in and have surgery and get out. It is months and months of tests, medication and procedures and a person can only handle so much. You deserve to be frustrated!
I am so glad you have this outlet and are able to let those feelings out and get the support that you need and deserve!!
There is a lot of love and support wrapped up in this website.
Take Care we are all praying that Peter will be back on track Monday!
Erika
Hi Peter, I hope your first day back at home was good. I always miss you when you leave my house. It’s fun hanging out with you and your Mom. And of course I love having your Dad and sisters here too when they come. Baron misses you too but he’s doing good. Be sure to gi8ve your Mom and Dad a big hug tonight. Even if they are big they still love and need hugs. Take care my little buddy. I love you a bunch. Gramma Mary
Hi Guys – Just wanted yuo to know – Jaake missed a couple of his counts also
Erika – Hang in Their -you & Peter are doing awesome.. I am very proud
of all of you.. Remember The Lord is in Control.. happy holidays to you guys..
Good news The Avs are winning 6-2 tonight… Peter you are a Super Kid.
Call us if you need us,,,
Love
The Cohen Family
Erika,
I can’t even pretend to know how you must be feeling, but as a parent I can relate to that feeling of just wanting your babies to be ok. You can’t possibly go through all of this and not feel angry, sad, frustrated and yes selfish………………..that’s normal! You have to have an out when things feel so overwhelming. Like others have said, there is no quick fix to this. Take comfort in knowing we are all still behind you and when you need to fall a little bit we’re here holding you up!
I hope you have a nice weekend at home.
Monday will come and this past week will be just that………..
Many thoughts and numerous prayers come your way,
Give each other a great big hug, that always makes you feel better!!
The Olson’s
Erica,
Your daycare mom hit it on the head!! No one can know what it is like except you. Being a mom you want to protect your family, you want only the best for them. Unfortunately, we don’t always have control of that. It is up to God. We have all been communicating with him on Peter’s behalf. We will continue to do that too! I feel your pain, but please keep the faith, keep the prayers. You and your family are very fortunate to have such loving family and friends to help you. Look for the little things and take it one day at a time. And…it is okay to get mad, frustrated and cry. Sometimes we need to do that and then start fresh again. Our prayers are with you and your family.
Peter get well soon. I hope you are feeling better. Merry Christmas!
Peter, Ty, Erika and rest of the family
Bumps in the road are only meant to make you stronger. With the progress you all have made together, it is clear from the outside looking in that whatever obstacles you face are there for a reason. With your continued hope and faith, and all the support and love you have in your circle of friends and family, these disappointments will keep you strong for the remainder of this fight which Pete is going to WIN.
You’ve been in our thoughts a whole bunch as the Holiday Season begins and we will continue to pray for you and watch your progress closely.
Keep your faith strong-let the Christmas Season helps that notion along as you continue your fight!
Our love-
The Jorgenson Family
Hey Pete – I sorry that we won’t be in together because I hopefully will get out sunday night. We will leave something for you at the 5B desk. I missed you. My hearing test told be that Im losing some hearing too, so they cut my cystplat dose down by 50% and so far that has helped me feel a little better. Good luck man – mary
Hello, It was so great to see all of you on Thanksgiving- we had a really nice time.
I am so sorry to hear that things didn’t go well this week- Erika you have every right to have whatever feelings you have right now- there is no “right” way to do this. If there was a “right” way you guys are doing it- as a family you have so much strength – it just shines through. “Hang in there” sounds so trivial- so, stay strong, lean on people and vent as much as you want – it keeps us sane!
Peter, you are such a strong, sweet little boy- it was so nice to see you – Brooke had a great time playing with you- she wants to see you again soon!
Love, Brenda, Greg Brooke & Ty
Erika,
My heart goes out to you….please know that there are angels around you and your family. I hope you can feel them and let them help you through this bump in the road. It is OK to let it out, we are all here to listen…I hope our words and prayers give you the strength you need.
Pam
Hey Peter, I hope to see you tomorrow morning sometime because that will mean your counts are up and you are ready to start round five. That also means I get to come and hand out with you in the hospital.
Erika and Ty, I’ll say a few more prayers tonight so that Peter is ready to go. Let me know what the verdict is after they do Peter’s blood tests.
Ellie and Kate, Ellie I sure had fun with you when you slept over Fri night. Have a great week with Grandma Barb and give Kate a big kiss for me.
love ya Gramma Mary
Peter –
Our favorite team WON!!!!! YAHOOO!!!!! That must have been an exciting game – now I wish I would have been there. Did you get a chance to go watch?? I bet your dad was happy happy happy!!!!
I know you have to go back to the hospital tomorrow and have some more tests – I hope they show that your ready for your next medicine. Prayers and hugs!!!!
Joni
Peteman,
I’m sorry last week was a bumpy trip so to speak, but starting tomorrow you’ll be back on track to beating this path thing. Tell your mom and dad to let us know if they need anything done for them. I’ll see you this week.
Take care, Love
Uncle Roy
Peter,
It was so great to see you on Saturday…..and what a game!!
(P.S. Your jersey is awsome!!!) Good luck this week as you start the next round , you are a TRUE WARRIOR Peter…………..fight fight fight!!!
We will be thinking of you all.
Lisa
We’re praying and pulling for you as you start this round.
Blessings,
The Ring family
Hi Pete 🙂
I was just sending Santa Clause an email checking to see if he’ll be able to make a stop at our daycare Christmas party again this year.. and I thought I would check Pete’s Page, too…. (well, not like it’s the first time I’ve checked it today or anything….. but who’s counting??!??!?!???!!!) 🙂 I was just hoping that maybe there would be a new posting saying that round #5 was underway…. I pray that your tests (for counts) came out well and that you are continuing your winning ways! We’ll keep checking for an update!
Love you and thinking of you daily~
Jenni, Ryan, Emily, Lily & Parker
Hi Peter!
My name is Benny Lindell. I used to play hockey for your father at Rosemount High School and was definitely not mentored by him, but more your grandma Mary (Miss you guys…). I see that your growning into quite the hockey player, which makes me smile to know that your following in your fathers footsteps. You have very good people surrounding you to keep fighting and make the curve in the road. I want you to know that I am thinking of you.
Ty and Erika,
Hi guys. Its been a long time and I’m not really quite sure what to say but I will continue to pray for your family. I